Thankgsiving Is A Long Time Coming
New Girl, Episode 6: Thanksgiving
So, along with the completely average episode title, I’d say this week’s ‘New Girl’ was just that: average. Don’t get me wrong, this show’s average is—at the moment—above average for a lot of other primetime shows (I’m looking at you, ‘Pan Am’). But, much like Pinocchio I cannot tell a lie, and the truth is that the last two episodes of ‘Girl’ were laugh-out-loud hilarious. There were a few LOL moments this week, but overall it was just good.
The episode starts with, of course, a school’s Thanksgiving pageant. Directing the Turkey spectacular is Paul (guest star Justin Long), a fellow teacher at Jess’ elementary/middle/high school? Sidenote: The coustumed-out students look closer to legal age than not, which confuses me since I can’t imagine that many high schoolers would respond positively to Jess whipping out her feeling stick during homeroom. Moving on. Since Jess is such a mensch—and because she loves any excuse to sing about turkeys and big hats (just a guess)—she volunteers to help with the production. Insert funny line here: {“I’d better go warm up the gourds}.
After hearing about the tragic passing of Paul’s nana, Jess invites him over to her ginormous loft to celebrate T’Giving with the roomies. Not surprisingly, Nick, Winston, and Schmidt (Grumpy, Boring, and Douchey-In-A-Cute-Way) are less-than-thrilled with Jess’ decision to host the holiday. After some caveman-esque grumbling about beer and football and Best Buy?, Jess wins over Schmidt by promising to invite her hot Indian model best friend, Cece. And, of course, she’s totally available.
Question: What are the odds that 5 different people have zero holiday plans with their families? Yes, Nick is from Chicago. Fine. And I’m guessing, after that traumatic dinner-table scene with the bunny costume, that Schmidt is estranged from his parents. That leaves Winston, Jess, and Cece. Winston should be itching to see his family after two years in Latvia, but I won’t judge. Maybe Cece’s family lives in India? Nope. Jess and Cece went to school together. Okay, I guess Indian families might not celebrate Turkey Day? Fine. Whatever. I guess it’s not that important, but it still bothers me.
So, Paul arrives at the firehouse loft with a skinny tie and a violin. Of course, we—and the roommates—quickly come to learn that Paul is Jess’ male twin; not literally, but he’s quirky and goofy and silly just like her (Dare I say, adorkable? No. Sorry). Former fat boy Schmidt is banished to the kitchen, while Cece hovers over him drinking a predictable martini.
Sensing some hostility from her roommates directed at her date, Jess begs Nick to be nice to Paul, and to make him feel at home. The dudes try to bro out with Paul while Jess exits for a wardrobe change. Nick can’t get past the pumpkin ale and Paul’s complete lack of football knowledge, but Winston bonds with Man-Jess over the recent deaths of their grandparents (Um, isn’t that MORE of a reason for Winston to spend the holiday with his family?).
Jess comes back out in a new outfit, which I’m 98% sure she bought off of the costume designer on the Lifetime Original, “The 19th Wife:” it’s real sister-wifey. The red frock is embellished with a pink bow, which makes it a lot more sister, and a lot less wife.
Some other stuff happens—Cece tries hard to gross out a very obsessive-compulsive-when-in-the-kitchen Schmidt with some food shenanigans, Paul and Nick ride dirty awkward together to the supermarket, and the turkey in the dryer forces the gang to re-locate from their now smoke-filled loft to the non-smoky one next door. Oh no, Thanksgiving is ruined. Worry not fair maiden, for Jess has purchased a self-healing turkey that magically re-cooks itself after getting blown up in a dryer. So, we’re all good on that front.
Jess, sensing the tension between Paul and Nick, pulls Grumpy aside and stage whispers to him how much she likes her violin-playing co-worker. She likes him so much that she wants to have BIG-TIME sex with him, which seems to include all the typical moves: The Bear Attack, What’s For Lunch, and Give Me That Hat. Sidenote: I’ve done 2 out of those 3—mine was more of a brunch than a lunch—but that’s neither here nor there.
Ultimately, the public sex talk isn’t what scares Paul away. No, it’s the dead body of the gang’s neighbor, Ms. Beverly, poised gracefully on her toilet that sends him weeping into the emergency blanketed arms of an 911-responder. Womp womp.
Jess is sad about how things ended with Paul, but she accompanies her roomies to Best Buy for some Black Friday deals (aka a new dryer). Nick apologizes to Jess in a super cute grumpy way—a nice tactic by Liz Meriwether to further showcase the dynamite chemistry between the two—and they giggle and get over it.
But then, alas, out of the mist comes her knight in shining emergency blanket. Yes! Paul is back, and he’s moved on since his dance with death (I assume the quick recovery is all thanks to a psychic medium who works Thanksgivings). He tells Jess he likes her, she tells him she likes him back, and the two skip off into the early morning whilst performing an impromptu duet.
So Grumpy, Boring, and Douchey-In-A-Cute-Way are left in line together, one roommate down, to buy a new dryer, which they now have to split 3 ways instead of 4 (…good thing they’re getting a deal).
